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creating genuine confidence

Whenever we learn anything new, it's normal, even preferable to be unconfident. If we begin by recognising that we don't yet have the competence to apply our new learning, we can begin to play, trying small and easy steps, and then as our competence builds, we can begin to feel confident - genuinely and solidly- without needing to pretend with the risk of being found out.

How can we be genuinely confident when every client is different, and even the same person has different experiences from one session to the next?

Erickson invited us to be totally confident that a person will go into hypnosis; will resolve their problem; will do what is best for them. But … how can be be genuinely confident in following his invitation?

Fernando Flores said that confidence comes from knowing our competencies and out incompetences. There’s nothing scarier that a confident incompetent person - in any situation! But … if we accept Flores’ opinion, what competencies are going to be relevant?

I have noticed from my own personal experiences and those of people who have learnt with me is that the most important competence for us to learn is that of listening. Erickson invited us “To observe, to observe, and to observe” and following his lead, we can increasingly focus and become absorbed in the client’s experience so we can respond sensitively and so, usefully.

When we have our attention on a client, our internal chatter about whether we are good enough, skilled enough, experienced enough all fade into the background, and allow our attention to be where it’s useful - on the client.

I have found that if I keep my attention on the client, and their experience, at the same time holding a mood of expectancy [confidence in each individual person’s competence - however as yet unrecognised this may be] then I can be confident, and the client can gain self-confidence, by exploring together each individual’s possibilities, and that this approach to hypnosis is a delightful way to learn through the experience of doing just that.

In this programme, I invite us all to start small and easy, play with friends, colleagues, client [with their permission] so our competence can grow organically and lead to a genuine experience of competence, as in any learning process.

You might enjoy viewing the conversation I had about this topic in the recording of our first coaching call.

I am available to answer questions, address concerns, and support your learning in any way I can - in the coaching calls, by email - rob@cet.net.au - or phone +61433273352.

Please enjoy your learning.

Rob

1 comment

 

Hi rob.. yes i like to remind myself.. the more i think i know.. the more i know that i dont know.. personal experience is all i know really and that experience is personal.. it can fade or be clouded or get foggy over time.. like sargent schultz said.. i know nothing.. lol

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